How I got pregnant with PCOS, and how I am healing after the loss...

Writing has always been a positive outlet for me... and in time of loss, this is something I know I have to share with whoever is willing to read...

I do not intent to focus this post on the loss of our first child, but rather on HOW I got pregnant.

As some of you may know from my past blog posts, I was diagnosed with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome and at the age of twenty-five, I was infertile.  By a miracle, or the miracle of nutrition and homeopathy, we naturally conceived.

So, I am taking a sad experience, and turning it into pure positivity. There is so much I am grateful for right now, and just getting pregnant takes the cake.  After such a terrible loss, it is hard for us to recover and come out of that dark hole, I am writing my way out of this hole in hopes to help at least one person. With the help of nutrition and homeopathy, I am healing both physically and emotionally.

 The story begins where I left off on my last post, a little less than year ago: my experimentation with calcium. Shortly after that post, I discovered (or my extremely research savvy sister, Lauren aka Ginger discovered) a supplement called Vitex. Vitex may in fact be THE natural cure for hormonal imbalances, like infertility. If you want to read more detail on what Vitex is, a great source can be found here.

Vitex comes from a beautiful purple plant from Greece and Italy. My personal favorite color, representing royalty! 

After doing much of my own research on Vitex, I thought, what do I have to lose? So I purchased Vitex as a extract from amazon.com (for a very reasonable price, mind you, as compared to in stores). 

On July 16th (yes I keep track of exact dates! It's what us infertile women do) I began taking one-full tincture of vitex directly under my tongue (quickest way to the bloom stream), one time a day. After about one month I added a second dose later in the day. 

Now as you may already know with natural and homeopathic remedies, the cure is not immediate, and you must be patient. Remember that these remedies are fixing imbalances in your body, this takes time! Where compared to modern medicine (which I do no oppose to, there is a time when modern medicine is absolutely necessary, and it is important to know when!) the cure is often right away, as the imbalance is not particularly fixed, but blanketed (reasons why once you begin many medications, you are on them for life... and if you stop the problem can very likely occur again). 

So like I was saying... I did not see immediate results.

However, I did begin to notice my mood changing for the better (with PCOS we can often be a little moody, thank you hormones!) and I began having less break outs on my face. 

Two months later, on September 13th, I got my period... and it was a  pretty normal period, or what I remember normal being like (remember that I did go almost 2 years without one!) Then, two months after that, in November, I got my period again! Finally, a little over a month later, at the end of December, it was back! By this point, I would consider my periods rather regular in just a few months after beginning Vitex.

Of course when the end of January came around, I was disappointed that I did not get my period, a sign that most women, or at least those with regular periods, would assume meant they were knocked up... but when you go years without a period, and then random months of getting one, you don't think much of a missed period. I of course just figured my PCOS was not done with me yet! 

About a week later I began getting symptoms which I thought at the time meant my period was indeed approaching (swollen boobs, fatigue, hunger, feeling dehydrated...) but after two weeks of that, and still no period, my husband insisted I take a pregnancy test. In my mind, regardless of all the things I have been doing to reverse my infertility, I did not think it was possible that I could be pregnant. So I did what my husband asked, and lo and behold, I was indeed pregnant! We could not have been any happier...

My pregnancy was very normal, I was sick as a dog (and hating everyone who told me that they never suffered from morning, or what I call ALL DAY sickness-- who was the jerk who decided to call it "Morning Sickness" anyway?), and the loss of our baby had absolutely nothing to do with my PCOS. But rather the very rare occurrence that can happen in fertilization, where either the egg or the sperm picked up an extra chromosome, in our case it was the chormosome 18. The results were that our baby had a fatal abnormality called Trisomy 18. We were unfortunately dealt a very challenging hand... but are grateful that we did the genetic testing, and were prepared for the loss of our baby. 

It has only been a few days since we lost our first child, and I can honestly say that time heals all things, and that I am not great... how could I be? But, given the situation, I am doing okay and getting stronger everyday, thanks to the support and love of my family, friends, and colleagues, and also with the assistance of my homeopath who helped me to begin healing before the baby even passed. I would like to save that post for another time, so please check in in about a week for a post about healing naturally after a loss.

Thank you for reading my blog, and for all of the love and support. Writing this post is one more step to my healing-- and I hope with all of my heart that this post reaches someone who has fertility issues, and like me, does not want to take fertility drugs... and that she too can find success.

With so much love <3